Waiting for news: The ongoing struggle and resilience of families who lost loved ones in the Russia-Ukraine Armed Conflict

Korosten, Zhytomyr region, Ukraine — Antonina Vakulenko (36 years) remembers her childhood with her younger brother, Mykola (33 years). The siblings grew up in a small village near Korosten, in the Zhytomyr region. In their childhood, they both frequently visited the Drevlianskyi Park and the Cathedral of Nativity, where their grandmother Mariia was part of the church choir. 

On 25 December 2022, Mykola was deployed to the frontline in Luhansk. Two days later, the family received notification that he had gone missing in action.

At the beginning of January 2023, Antonina and her family began searching for information about Mykola through several Telegram channels. They scoured every available source, even finding footage that led them to believe he might have been killed after being injured. However, by March 2023, the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC) informed them that Mykola was a Prisoner of War.

The uncertainty and heartache have been overwhelming, but Antonina finds solace in connecting with other families of PoWs from her brother's unit. "It helps me cope mentally with the situation we are all in," she says. "We share the same pain, and together, we support each other. When a new family joins us, we’re all there to help."

In March 2023, Antonina was granted a brief moment of relief—a phone call with Mykola from his place of detention. "I want my brother back," she says with quiet determination, "and I hope for the safe return of all missing and captured soldiers and civilians as soon as possible."

Poltava, Ukraine — Lidiia Misiurenko, 71, has spent the last decade searching for her son, Borys Misiurenko, 49, who was taken captive on 20 June 2014 in the Luhansk region. Borys dedicated himself to delivering aid to soldiers in the region. 

Borys' son, Maksym, now 27, was deeply affected by his father's capture. In response, Maksym took humanitarian aid to the village of Shchastia. Later that year, he joined the Ukrainian Armed Forces and has served ever since. He even received a medal from the National Security Council of Ukraine. Lidiia has tirelessly sought any information about Borys for the past ten years, but her efforts have yielded little. At times, she feels as though her son has been forgotten about.

Lidiia is now part of NGO “Families of Captives and Missing Persons of Poltava”, a group of civilians who share a common fate—the disappearance or capture of their loved ones. Despite the long years of uncertainty, she remains resolute in her belief: "I do believe Borys is alive and will come back to us one day," she says with quiet determination.

Kharkiv, Ukraine — Svitlana Bilous, 34, originally from the Donetsk Region, has lived in Kharkiv since 2006. Her husband, Anatolii, 35, also from Kharkiv, went missing in action in April 2023 in the Donetsk region. 

Before Anatolii was deployed, they married in a private ceremony. He promised Svetlana that upon his return, “they would celebrate their marriage before God”. His last message to her was, “You are the most important person in my life.”

When Anatolii failed to contact her, Svitlana began reaching out to his army friends and unit until she received an official notification that Anatolii had been missing in action.

Determined to find her husband, Svitlana searched for information in every way she could. The first month after his disappearance was particularly difficult for Svitlana, as Kharkiv has endured constant shelling. She connected with other families of missing soldiers, finding mutual support and comfort. She also became active in social media groups dedicated to families of the missing. 

During the escalation of the armed conflict in 2022, Svitlana and Anatolii volunteered to help people trapped in their building, bringing them groceries and other essentials. Svitlana continues to volunteer whenever she can, driven by the belief that Anatolii is still alive and that they will be reunited one day.

Poltava, Ukraine — Liudmyla Sidko, 26, and her husband Vitalii, 30, shared a life marked by love and loss.

A few days before Liudmyla lost contact with Vitalii, he returned home to Chutove village for a brief visit. The couple cherished those last moments together. Before he left again, he gave to Liudmyla a small teddy bear puppet as a parting gift. Later, he was confirmed as killed-in-action at the frontline in Klishchiivka, close to Bakhmut city.

After Vitalii’s death, Liudmyla found it too painful to stay in Chutove, where they had lived together. She decided to move to Poltava, where they spent much time together. "Do not give up on your life, take care of yourselves, and always remember the good things you had with your loved ones," she says, holding onto the memories they created.

Liudmyla finds solace in spending time with her older sister Tetiana, and her two young sons. Being with family has helped her cope with the overwhelming grief.

Liudmyla now dreams of writing a book about Vitalii’s life, hoping to preserve his memory and their shared experiences for the future. 

Chornukhy, Poltava — Valentyna Savustianenko, 54, lost her only son, Ihor Lytvyn, in January 2023.

Ihor joined the Ukrainian Armed Forces in 2015 and served three years before returning to civilian life in 2018. During that time, he and his girlfriend Olena welcomed their son, Sviatoslav, who is now five years old. 

The escalation of the armed conflict in 2022 altered the course of Ihor’s life. In August 2022, he was deployed to Soledar in the Bakhmut district. Initially reported missing in action, his family was left in agonizing uncertainty. In January 2023, he was officially confirmed as killed in action.

Valentyna received the devastating news that her son was missing on the very day he died. Just the day before had been his birthday and they had spoken on the phone. “Everything will be fine,” Ihor had reassured her. “I will be back alive, and all will be good.”

The bond between the mother and son was strong, and after he was reported missing, Valentyna joined protests and desperately searched for any information about Ihor. 

In February 2023, during an exchange of bodies between the two sides, Ihor's body was returned to Ukraine. In December 2023, a DNA test confirmed his identity and his death. Despite this, Valentyna has held onto hope, saying, "I hope one day, my son will knock on my window and say, ‘Hi mom, I'm back, and I'm alive.’”

Now, Valentyna shares her experience with other Ukrainian families facing similar situations, offering guidance and support to those still searching for their loved ones.

Kyiv, Ukraine - Alina Potapova, 34, has been waiting for over a year for the return of her fiancé, Oleksiy, who has been in captivity since late July 2023. Shortly after he went missing in action, Oleksiy was declared a prisoner of war.

In civilian life, Oleksiy was a professional musician, known for his skill on the saxophone. He was also fluent in several languages. Alina and Oleksiy’s relationship blossomed quickly after they met. "He had incredible, kind eyes that reflected his sincerity and nobility. He is a true gentleman in the modern world," Alina fondly recalls.

Just a week before his disappearance, they spent several days together, a time that holds special significance for Alina. "On the train station platform, I managed to say the most important thing: 'Whatever happens, I will always be with you, because you are a part of me and my best person.' And I faithfully keep this promise," she shares.

For over a year, Alina has had no contact with her fiancé and remains uncertain about his condition. Her primary focus now is to establish communication through correspondence under the Geneva Conventions and to await a potential prisoner exchange. "Captivity kills not only those who are there but also their families. The waiting and uncertainty drive one mad, but we fight for their freedom every day and will continue to fight until all our defenders return home," Alina concludes.

Alina and Lyosha met in the neighborhood and started dating. She wears a necklace that has another part with Lyosha, strengthening their bond even in these difficult times. Lyosha's status was confirmed as a PoW.

Kyiv, Ukraine — Nina’s brother Andrii was 48 years old, married with 3 children, and living with his family in Mariupol. He went missing in action at the end of March 2022 near his home city. The last time the family was in touch with him was on 28 February. Andrii disappeared on 21 March 2022. 

Since then, Nina and her family have been doing everything they can to find any information about Andrii. She is in contact with other families of the missing and captured soldiers and civilians, and she regularly attends all the meetings and events organised by the families and authorities in the hope of getting any information about her brother. 

A wife of one of the soldiers in the same unit with Andrii said her husband told her he saw him during the combat, but they didn’t talk.

Andrii's wife, Maryna, is actively searching for information about Andrii with Nina, but so far, they have not received any news about his whereabouts.